For Life, Not Just For Yule
by furu
Summary: Christmas fic, post Advent Children. Cloud gets the present of a lifetime. CloudxSephiroth, rated T for Cid and some implied stuff.
1. Chapter 1

_I wrote this fic as a Christmas present for my friends on LJ. I hope others will like it too. Contains **shonen-ai/boy love **so if you don't like that kind of stuff, this is not the fic for you then. (See author's notes in the end on clarification of **Yule**, or the Midgarian version of Christmas.)_

**Chapter 1**

It is Yule in Midgar. Fresh snow covers everything in powdery white, singsong voices carry in the air from the surrounding houses. On an evening like this, even the normally dirty streets look clean and the candles on windows turn the scenery into a sea of twinkling lights. The weather isn't very cold, just pleasantly chilly, but Cloud has still taken a thick sweater on to ward off the cool air. He doesn't really need it, the Mako in his blood makes him impervious to such slight discomfort, but it just makes him feel better as he blends in with the few other people he sees on the streets rushing home to their families.

Cloud isn't heading home, but away from the place he currently calls home. He is still staying at Tifa's bar, the 7th Heaven, though he isn't sure why. Nothing really keeps him in Midgar anymore, but the lack of destination and direction has made him stay there. It has been months since the incident with the three silver-haired men, months since he saw the person -_ Sephiroth_ - he thought he had lost forever. In the end it wasn't really him, just his shell, except maybe on the final moment when Cloud again, for the third time - _third time_ - had killed him. He hadn't thought he had it in him to do it again, but the realization it really wasn't /him/ had helped him do it.

"They say third time's the charm", Cloud murmurs to himself dryly, chuckling under his breath. He had lost his dreams yet again, he had been forced to deal with the sorrow once more. It didn't get easier. Each time he had to start over after the man was gone. And on a day like this, with so many memories -_good_ memories -from the past, he just had felt the sudden need to be alone. Maybe that's why he had slipped away from Tifa's party, the bar too noisy with the shrill voices of the Midgar orphans' laughter as they played around the tree. Yuffie had been trying to get Vincent to try some of the punch that the party crasher Reno undoubtedly had spiked... Trust Reno to sniff a party from a mile away. The red-head always turned up if he wasn't out of town, invitation or not.

Snowflakes start falling from the sky again, enhancing the illusion that against all odds, Midgar has turned into a land of fairy tale. Not the white and dry snow that had fallen earlier, but big and damp flakes that cling to his sweater and stick to his spiky blonde hair as he wanders through the streets.

Lost in his thoughts, Cloud's steps lead him to Aeris' church. He goes there every now and then, to reminisce. He can feel the flower girl's presence there, where the Lifestream still idly mingles with the water in the pool where the flowers used to bloom. Sometimes he thinks Zack is there too with Aeris. He hasn't seen Aeris since the day he stopped Kadaj and Jenova.

_it was Jenova, it wasn't Sephiroth, it wasn't him_

Cloud pushes open the wooden doors, running his hand through the unruly blonde spikes in a futile attempt to shake off the snowflakes before they melt in his hair. The church is unexpectedly warm, even with the huge holes where the roof used to be. Yet the rafters high up are covered in snow, as if the warmth only stretches to the level of the floor. The pool of Lifestream mixed with water is practically steaming. No one has bothered cleaning the place up much, the benches are still strewn across the floor in pieces, and there rarely are visitors nowadays, most of the sick people already cured from Geostigma.

The blonde approaches the pool, his old SOLDIER issue boots clanking on the floorboards. He searches the debris for a while, and soon locates a stash of blankets from the time when he used to sleep in the church. Deciding that he might just as well make himself comfortable, he spreads them on the floor by the edge of the pool, sitting cross-legged on them.

Cloud's mind is filled with a mix of melancholy and nostalgia. He remembers the last happy Yule he experienced years ago, before the nightmare started in Nibelheim. Before the years in Hojo's experiments, before... all that pain. He spent that last Yule with Zack and Sephiroth, Zack who ever so cheerfully couldn't stop playing pranks, although the silly mistletoe had been one of his most successful in Cloud's mind. The memory makes him smile. Sephiroth had kissed him under that mistletoe, and Cloud had kissed him back, playing along with Zack's prank in a sudden burst of boldness. What had started innocently that evening, had developed to something serious, and turned into the happiest time in Cloud's life.

The blonde man fights back tears, lost in the memory. Gods how he misses Zack, his best friend, his _only_ friend through so many years. And he misses Sephiroth, the pain of the loss stronger than ever. The good memories tear open old wounds and pull even more memories to the surface. No matter how deep he tries to bury them, they keep coming back. Cloud doesn't even realize he has been crying until he sees his reflection on the surface of the pool. He mirrors himself for a while, drying his eyes, and tries to coax some life into his blonde spikes that seem to droop more in sympathy than from the melted snow. Sighing, he kneels by the pool, dipping his hand in the liquid, feeling the at the same time warm and cool tendrils of the Lifestream twine in his fingers before they let them go again.

"Happy Yuletide, Aeris", he whispers in a muffled voice. To Cloud's surprise, the Lifestream ripples as if in reply, rising up to a woman's form. First transparent, but as it solidifies it turns into the former flower girl of the slums, dressed in the familiar powder pink dress with a darker red vest over it, long brown braid hanging down her back. The image of Aeris opens her emerald green eyes and smiles as she steps closer to Cloud walking on the surface of the pool.

"Happy Yuletide to you too, Cloud", she says, cocking her head to the side, smiling in her gentle and sagely manner.

"Aeris?" the blonde gasps. He feels his mouth hang open, he has seen Aeris' spirit several times, but never so closely, never so lifelike. She looks exactly like he remembers, exactly like she did on the day she perished.

"I know, I know, shouldn't creep up on people", Aeris laughs. "I have been given a message to deliver to you, that's why I am here tonight. A message, and a present from the Planet, and me and Zack."

"Zack...?" Cloud almost can't believe his ears. "Is Zack here too?"

"Yes, Zack is coming too but he got... detained for a while, he has to see to something first. We both have been looking after you, you know", Aeris winks at Cloud.

"Both of you?" Cloud frowns. "Do I really need looking after so badly?"

"You are dear to us, and we want the best for you, for you to be happy", Aeris replies, still smiling but a tinge of sadness in her voice.

"Happy... It is such a long time since I last was happy, truly happy", Cloud sighs. Melancholy is still lingering in his mind, under the joy of seeing Aeris, hearing Aeris talk.

"I know, Cloud. Being dead has some advantages. Not many things stay secret in the Lifestream, after all, it touches everyone", Aeris perks up. "So, what do you want for present this Yule?" she grins, almost mischievously. _Zack must be rubbing off on her_, Cloud thinks. But the question is serious and sincere, and he feels the memories and the sadness flood him again.

"What I want... I don't think you can give me what I want", Cloud stares at the floor, not wanting to meet the flower girl's eyes, afraid of what his own might reveal.

"It's not just a present from us, it's a present from the Planet. You have done so much for the Planet, it wants to give you something back. This evening, you can ask for anything, and it will be granted, whatever it may be", Aeris smiles sagely. Cloud looks up at her, then reverts his eyes back to the floor for a moment longer before he lifts his eyes to meet the Cetra girl's steady gaze.

"Whatever it may be?" the blonde asks, half musingly to himself, as if tasting the words, reassuring himself that he heard them correctly. "The Planet would grant me anything?"

"Yes", Aeris nods. "But only tonight, only for Yule."

"Anything... And I could keep what I ask, it wouldn't be mine just for Yule?"

Aeris nods. "That's correct", she confirms in a steady voice.

"What if I ask the impossible?" Cloud licks his lips, biting his cheek while his head mills with thoughts, with _possibilities_. Aeris moves closer, her steps forming ripples on the surface of the pool.

"You're the Planet's Champion, its saviour. You can wish for anything. _Anything_ and it will be granted. Trust me", she says kneeling down in front of Cloud. "I trusted you when you were my bodyguard, trust me now on this", she smiles.

Cloud feels his stomach clench. He is starting to realize he's been handed a second chance - or third, or Gods only know how many chances he's lost over the years - on happiness.

"Aeris... can you tell me something? Before I tell you what I want for present?" Cloud asks, wanting to be sure.

"Go ahead and ask whatever you need to know", Aeris smiles and nods.

"Is Jenova gone? Truly gone?" Cloud holds his breath.

"Well... Yes and no." Aeris gestures with her hand. "She is gone from the Lifestream, she will no longer hurt the planet. You destroyed the last piece of her with Sephiroth and Kadaj, and the Lifestream in the rain washed the rests away. But there are still a few cells left, in people who have been hiding underground, who haven't been touched by the purifying rain. They can't do any harm anymore though. They have been separated from Jenova so long and with the "mother" gone they have no mind of their own. Her presence won't scar the Planet anymore. She has, in a way, become a part of the Planet now", the Cetra girl assures.

Cloud, feeling almost panicky, gathers all his courage, prepares to get turned down anyway despite of all the reassurance. He's afraid what Aeris will say, after all, he has never told anyone... He has kept it a secret for so many years that revealing it now seems impossible. But he has a chance, and he doesn't want to waste it. So Cloud asks the impossible, the only thing that still means something to him, the only thing that would make his life worth living.

"Aeris... Can the Planet give me back the only one I ever truly loved? Give me back Sephiroth?" Cloud fights back tears as the words leave his lips, afraid he'll get laughed at, mocked. Afraid that Aeris will be appalled, but she just looks at him with smiling eyes.

"I knew you'd ask for that", she almost laughs. "Was that why you wanted to be sure of Jenova? Don't worry, Cloud. We wouldn't bring him back if he still was Jenova's puppet."

Cloud just stares at her, barely comprehending what she is saying. "You mean..."

"I said anything. The Planet is wiser and kinder than you think, and it knows, it knows everything... It doesn't grant wishes like that lightly. You have given all you had, sacrificed more than anyone should, and it is time for your reward", Aeris rises up from her knees and steps back to the middle of the pool, twirling her hand as her staff suddenly appears out of thin air. She taps the end of her staff on the surface, and the Lifestream ripples again. This time it takes the form of a man, with long brown hair, dressed in a similar fashion as Cloud.

"Zack..." the blonde gasps.

"Hey Spike", Zack grins and waves his hand at Cloud. "Sorry I couldn't be here earlier but I had some briefing to do", he winks. Cloud wishes he could run to his friend and hug him, but he is standing next to Aeris on the surface of the pool.

"Zack, I've missed you", Cloud feels his eyes water yet again, and scolds himself for being such a cry-baby until his sense of humour catches up with him. "Briefing? Has SOLDIER moved to Lifestream now too?"

"Sort of, but not for long. I had to catch up with your Yule present and make sure everything is ok", Zack's grin widens even more and Cloud is sure the top of his head will soon fall off.

"You know, the Lifestream doesn't have much experience at handing presents like this, but I believe you should reach under the surface right... about... _now_. And mind the hair, you know how grouchy he gets when someone messes with his hair."

Cloud almost falls into the pool as he plunges his arm down in the watery Lifestream. First he can't feel anything, then strands of something touch his arm, then his hand meets another hand and he curls his fingers around it as he pulls.

"Sorry I couldn't get a chance to gift wrap your present, Spike", Zack chimes. The impossible grin gets even wider.

Cloud is still struggling to pull the limp form out of the pool and gift wrapping is the last thing on his mind. Finally he manoeuvres the unconscious man on the floor, tears streaming down his face again, but this time out of happiness. He grabs a blanket and wraps it around the man, using another to try and dry his mass of silver hair. It is Sephiroth - _Sephiroth -_and he's here, _really here_. Cloud's heart sings of joy, ready to burst. Aeris steps closer and leans down, placing her hand on the silver haired man's forehead, and as from cue, he draws a ragged breath, coughing up water. Cloud keeps cradling his treasured gift in his arms, not believing this is really happening. Sephiroth opens his eyes as Cloud kisses him gently on the lips. The eyes are clear, trying to focus on Cloud's, and there's no trace of Jenova in their depths.

"Cloud..." the man's voice is nothing but a whisper, but it's music to the blonde's ears. "Zack came to see me... and told me you wanted to be happy... Why are you crying, Cloud?"

Cloud hugs Sephiroth closer, burying his face in the still wet matted hair, kissing the man's brow. "I thought I'd never see you again", he murmurs. "I've missed you so much, I don't ever want to lose you again. I love you, Seph."

"I guess I'm sort of their official match maker by now", Zack chuckles as he mutters to Aeris, earning a gentle swat on his arm from the girl.

"Cloud..?" Aeris says in a soft voice, smiling down at the blonde. "We have to leave now, but we will be back to check up on you. Both of you."

"Remember now, Cloud", Zack adds, "presents like that are for life, not just for Yule." Cloud thinks he can see Zack hug Aeris as they fade back into the Lifestream with a burst of hearty laughter.

_Wouldn't have it any other way..._

Cloud wraps his arms tighter around his present. He knows he'll have to do a lot more explaining than with a puppy, but he doesn't care. Future seems like something to look forward to now, and the Yule's to come don't promise painful memories. His angel is back.

**Autho****r's notes:**

1. This was really meant to be a one-shot in the dark, poked with a big long stick in the hopes of hitting something good. Then shit happened, Kirsty gave me a plot bunny to pet, and yea… Well if the ending doesn't seem to lead into anything, it's because it was meant to be a one-shot.

2. Fluff. Bite me.

3. Seriously, how many ways is there to resurrect Sephiroth? Everyone wants him back, no use wasting a good idea…

4. Yule well, it's anyone's guess how they'd celebrate it on the Planet, so I decided my Yule is sort of a mix of Christmas and New Year. In other words, you give and receive presents, and at the same time celebrate the New Year. It works for me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The 7th Heaven is filled with decorations for Yule, the smell of food, and the laughter of the orphaned children of Midgar Tifa has taken under her wing. Today, everyone has gathered to celebrate on the darkest night of the year. People are with their loved ones, give presents to one another, and remember those who are no longer here, while the year idly moves from the old to the new.

Vincent Valentine isn't really into celebrating Yule. Right now he is almost panicky, a feeling very unusual for him. The orphans have him surrounded, after the first few moments of trying to hide from him. Vincent is used to his looks causing people to pull away from him, people not wanting to look at him, but the children are proving hard for the ex-Turk. As soon as they had decided there was no imminent danger from him, they had been utterly fascinated by his odd eyes, flowing cloak and even the claw Vincent hated so much himself. To his relief, the small Yule presents Tifa has arranged for the children soon distract them, giving him room to breathe.

As he tries to find a peaceful and secluded corner, Yuffie practically tackles him, offering him some punch. The ninja is taking a full swing on every holiday when she gets the chance, today sporting a silly party hat with a moogle hanging from the top. Vincent frowns at the offered cup, he saw Reno near the punch bowl earlier and he knows the red-headed Turk well enough by now to not trust his ability to behave.

"C'mon Vinny, try it!" Yuffie giggles gleefully, holding out a cup of punch. Vincent winces inwardly. He has resigned to Yuffie calling him whatever she feels like, it does no good trying to make her drop the nicknames. In a sudden burst of holiday spirit, the former Turk feels himself obliging.

"You know Reno has probably spiked this by now?" he asks as he takes the cup from Yuffie. The ninja nods, her head bobbing furiously, the bell inside the moogle on her hat chiming.

"I saw him do it, but it doesn't taste that bad", she grins. "Probably kicks like a fat chocobo come tomorrow though, it looked like he had some of Midgar's finest moonshine", she says as she takes another swig from her own cup.

"Better go tell Tifa so she can keep it away from the kids then?" Vincent lifts his eyebrow.

"Uhhh… you're probably right…. I'll go do that right away!" Yuffie bites her lip, then skips off to find Tifa.

Vincent examines the cup in his hand. He is slightly worried about Cloud. He doubts anyone else noticed, but he saw him slip out earlier. The ex-Turk was locked away from the world for over two decades, but he understands the regrets and memories the blonde carries with him probably better than anyone else. They both have their own burdens, who is he to judge Cloud if he prefers to have some solitude when his memories take over?

Vincent grimaces as he tastes the punch. What the hell has Reno added to it?

---

Tifa glances out of the window. It is snowing again, but the weather looks like it has gotten warmer, the snowflakes are big and sloppy, not like the fine powder that had fallen earlier that day. She places the tray of cookies she's carrying on the nearby table and leans to look down on the street. It isn't that late yet, but it is the shortest day of the year and it is getting darker fast.

The brunette fighter sighs as she strokes a lock of hair from her eyes. She has been looking for Cloud everywhere in the bar but he is nowhere to be located.

"Cid, do you know where Cloud is?" she asks the pilot as he passes by, the ever present dog end of a cigarette hanging from the side of his mouth. Cid Highwind has tried to quit smoking but with little success.

"Sorry Tifa, I don't." The presence of so many children has made Cid feel a bit uneasy, and for the first time in known history, he is watching his tongue, a feat achieved only by grim determination and the stomping of foot he got from Tifa earlier. "Maybe he needed some fresh air? I haven't seen him for a while now", he suggests.

"Maybe…" Tifa doesn't sound convinced. She has a hunch that Cloud has gone to greet Aeris. Tifa still isn't sure how she feels about the now deceased flower girl. She isn't getting anywhere with Cloud and sometimes she suspects that it is because Cloud can't let go of the Cetra, even though she has been dead for years now. She is grateful for what the girl did to help them during the Meteor and again last summer, but in her mind, the dead should remain dead.

"Maybe…" she repeats as she brushes off her apron and picks up the tray of cookies again.

---

Vincent's mantle is beeping furiously as he fishes the in the folds of it for his cell phone. He had managed so many years without one but last summer he'd finally gotten to the conclusion that he too should probably follow the modern times and join this decade, so he had bought one. He finally locates the wretched gadget and gingerly flips open the cover. "CHOCOBOHEAD" the screen blinks. Cloud had programmed his own number into Vincent's phone, under his rarely used but rather accurate nickname.

"Hello?" Vincent curses in his mind as he takes the call. He might own a cell phone but he doesn't have to like it… "Cloud, where are you? Tifa is getting worried."

"Let her worry", Cloud's voice crackles in the phone. "Vincent? I have a huge favour to ask. And you must keep it a secret. Don't tell anyone, especially not Tifa."

"You know me, Cloud, you know you can trust me. What can I help you with?" Vincent feels his brow frown. Cloud doesn't sound like his usual self. He sounds almost elated, but hasty at the same time.

"I guess you could say I have a bit of a situation here", the ex-Turk notices how Cloud is almost stumbling in the words. "I am in the church, and I have someone here who needs help. He needs to borrow some clothes but mine are too small. Do you have anything you could lend?" Vincent can tell his friend is trying to sound calm but he knows the blonde well enough to know he is excited about something. He sees no reason to not agree to help him, after all, he doesn't sound like he's done something really stupid and gotten himself in any serious trouble. Besides, most of the old AVALANCHE members have belongings stashed away at the 7th Heaven in case they ever come to town unexpectedly, and Vincent is no exception.

"I think I have a sweater and some old slacks here somewhere… Does this person need shoes too? I think there might be some Cid's boots around here somewhere that he never wore because they were too big." Vincent says pondering what kind of trouble the person in the church might be in to need to borrow clothes at such time. This mystery intrigues his mind.

"That would do fine, Vincent", Cloud's voice sounds relieved.

"You'll have to give me some time to sneak out of here", Vincent replies as he silently slides up the stairs to Tifa's guest room to ransack the closet for his own belongings.

"Thank you so much Vincent." Cloud hangs up, and Vincent sighs quietly as he pulls clothing from the shelves. He can't fight the feeling of relief for the chance to get away from the horde of orphans, as harsh as that may sound like.

_Rather go out in the snow than have kids hanging from my cloak again_, the ex-Turk grimaces.

Fifteen minutes later Vincent slips out of the bar and into the streets of Midgar. His departure goes unnoticed except by Reno, who just shrugs it off. Less people means more booze for him, though Valentine didn't seem like much of a drinker to him.

---

Snow has covered all previous footsteps as the red-cloaked man reaches the old church in the slums. Something in Cloud's voice has made him check several times that he's not being followed, though he scolds himself for such paranoia. Vincent stops for a second at the door to adjust his grip on the bag of clothes he's holding in his clawed hand, and pushes the doors open. He gasps at the sudden rush of heated air. The church is warm, and the pool of Lifestream glows with a soft light, making the place seem much more welcoming than he'd have expected. Still, it takes even his trained eyes a while to locate Cloud.

Cloud is sitting by the pool, leaning his back against one of the pillars supporting what's left of the church roof. He is holding something… no, someone wrapped completely in blankets, holding as if the person was the most precious thing in the world. The blonde looks up as Vincent approaches, startled by the sudden sound of footsteps, having been too enveloped in his own thoughts to hear the church door open and close. The look on his face sends the normally stoic ex-Turk reeling in his mind. He has known Cloud for over two years now, but he's never seen such pure joy on the man's face, his eyes have never shined like they do now. Even the man's hair seems to be spikier than usual, as if he has gained a new inner glow.

"Vincent… Thank you for coming", Cloud returns his gaze back to the bundle of blankets on his lap, adjusting his hold on the person huddled next to his chest. "Don't get mad, Vincent. I know you'll be shocked, but it'll be all right. He's all right", Cloud smiles gently as he looks down at the person still hidden under the blankets.

"He? Who's he?" Vincent feels an eerie shiver run down his spine. Something doesn't add up, why such secrecy concerning this mystery person that has made Cloud so joyful? The red-cloaked man steps closer to Cloud, walking around the blonde to get a closer look of the bundled form Cloud seems to treasure so much. Red eyes widen for a moment when he sees the mass of silver hair cascade down to the floor as Cloud unwraps the blanket covering the other man's head.

"Sephiroth…?" Vincent hears himself gasping. "Cloud, how – how is this possible?"

"Aeris brought him back. _The Planet_ brought him back", Cloud sounds protective, as if he's trying to justify the sudden presence of the silver-haired man.

"But… why?" Vincent's mind is in chaos, but not a twitch on his face reveals this inner turmoil.

"Because I asked for it", the blonde smiles as he caresses the crown of the sleeping man's head, running his fingers through the silver hair as if it was the most exquisite thing known to him. Vincent wants a more precise answer but he has a feeling Cloud won't give him one, not right now. But things are starting to make more sense to him, things that had been worrying him about the blonde during their travel to stop the meteor and stop Sephiroth. _I'll be damned_, he hears his inner voice splutter.

"Is he okay?" he ventures, deciding it might be better not to press matters too much with Cloud at the moment.

"He has a mild Mako poisoning. You can't avoid that when you go swimming in the Lifestream." Cloud's head snaps up and he locks his gaze with Vincent's as he says: "He's not insane. Jenova is gone, Aeris promised me that. He is the Sephiroth I once knew, the Sephiroth I love, not Jenova's puppet."

_…love…?_

Vincent doesn't think it is any of his business, he isn't big on gossip, but this is quite unexpected.

The red-cloaked man can only nod. He too trusts Aeris. As things are, it might just be better to accept it all for now. He knows a lot more about sin and absolution than he would like to, and he senses that Cloud has reached a personal absolution for a sin he had taken on as his own, though no sin ever was committed.

"Cloud, what are you going to do? You can't stay here with him if he's got Mako poisoning. He needs a place to rest and he needs treatment", Vincent bites his lip as he thinks how the other AVALANCHE members will react when they hear that Sephiroth has returned.

"I'll figure something out", Cloud says, totally focused on the man sleeping in his arms. But a shadow passes across the blonde man's face as the reality presents itself to him. "I can't take him to Tifa's place like this. The others would kill him before I could get a word out of my mouth", he says, worry in his voice. Vincent feels bad for him, already understanding the hardships the blonde is going to face once he confronts his friends with the news.

"We could take him to the Sierra if you trust Cid enough for that. But you better let me talk to him first…" the ex-Turk suggest, rubbing a hand over his red eyes. This won't be a walk in the park but he knows that once he gets Cid on his side, the rest will be easy. He can see Cloud thinking as the blonde weighs the options.

"Yes… I think that will do for now", he agrees finally. Vincent pulls out his cell phone, mentally wincing at the idea of trying to explain this to Cid over a phone call as he punches the number in.

Cloud is oblivious to his surroundings. All that matters to him is the silver haired man pressed against his chest. He gladly leaves the problems of the world to Vincent this evening.

**Author's notes:**

1. Vincent. So much love. Though he frowns too much. But he frowns so cutely. Oh, squeee.

2. Um, this is the plot bunny Kirsty introduced to my mind. I had no idea how this would turn out, but then again, looks like I never have an idea what I will end up with when I start writing.

3. I don't like writing cussing, apart from the occasional F-word, a few hells and a damned. So Cid has been forced to behave! Ha, that will teach him! Maybe I'll introduce nicotine patches to him in the future…

4. Hope everyone is staying in character, cuz damn. I wasn't planning on adding so many characters.

5. Reno disaster. I can totally see him crashing an unsuspecting party. Hopefully he'll appear more if I write further instalments to this universe.

6. The airship in Advent Children is called the Sierra. Cid probably still has the Highwind, but since I'm trying to stick to AC canon, it's the Sierra from now on.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

First he is just one of the many voices in the Lifestream, not any different from them. He has had his own voice once, he has been a person once.

Then he remembers. He remembers his name as the first thing that returns to him. He remembers pain, blood, fire… But the memories are as if they belong to someone else, not him. He remembers sparkling, impossibly blue eyes and the feeling of peace mingled with the sadness and sorrow of something lost forever. He remembers tears. Not his own, but the blue eyed man's as he sees the man wail in sorrow inside the memory. He knows this man… He remembers the man's name.

The flood of memories is abruptly interrupted when he feels a touch on his shoulder. Just moments before he was just another spirit in the Lifestream, now he has a body. How is this possible? He lifts his hands, examines them. They look like he remembers them, except for the tattoo on the back of his hand. It is gone. Somehow that makes him happy, he isn't sure why but he decides he can try to figure out that later. He touches his head, runs his fingers through the long strands of hair. This makes him feel happy too. His hair has always been the biggest spot for vanity, he is certain of that knowledge, and he is content to know it is all still there. He looks down his body and realizes he is naked. This doesn't bother him, he is not ashamed of himself, though the matter of clothing should probably be addressed later.

"Finished checking your important bits yet, Seph?"

The voice makes Sephiroth spin around. He has been so caught up in his thoughts and the wonder of having a form, a body again, that he hasn't realized someone is there with him. The ex-General scolds himself in his mind for letting this happen. He looks at the newcomer and another wave of memories greets him. The man in front of him is wearing a blue outfit, a SOLDIER outfit, he recalls. He has unruly dark hair that falls to his back just below his shoulders like a mane, and he has a wide grin on his face. Sephiroth knows this man too…

"Hi Seph, long time no see", Zack grins.

---

Sephiroth feels like everything around him is spinning. Things are happening that he knows should be impossible. Yet here he is, standing in the Lifestream with his former second in command, when he knows somewhere in the back of his mind that the dark-haired man should by all means be dead. He himself should be dead. What is going on?

"This is the Lifestream, right? Am I dead?" the silver-haired man asks, looking at the swirling green haze surrounding them. Somehow they're both standing on something that feels like ground, yet there doesn't seem to be any solid surface anywhere around them.

"You were dead. Right now you're in a sort of a limbo. What happens next depends on you", Zack explains, still grinning, but there is a definite hint of seriousness under the cheerful surface. "If there ever was a time for you to pull that stick out of your ass and start acting like a normal human being, that time is now, Seph."

"What do you mean?" Sephiroth can feel his face draw to the usual, stern and distant expression as he hears Zack scolding him.

"I mean just that. This is a second chance, and I am really hoping you won't blow it. Now, what do you remember?" the dark-haired man asks.

"I don't remember much but I have a feeling I did something bad before I ended up here", Sephiroth frowns, the memories escaping him. He recalls the flames from his memories, the pain… That can't have been good. The silver-haired man is still annoyed at Zack lecturing him, but in his mind he knows that the SOLDIER is right. He has always hidden himself behind a wall of arrogance, and only a chosen few have ever seen the person he really is. The part of him that is the General rebels against Zack's words, screaming insubordination, though the more sensible part of his mind tells him to shut up and listen to the dark-haired man.

"Well, you only tried to blow up the Planet, if that counts as bad", Zack's eyes widen as he slaps his hand over his mouth. "My bad… That wasn't how I meant to break the news to you", he stutters with a muffled voice, the palm of his hand still covering his mouth.

"Blow up the Planet…?" Sephiroth feels his legs buckle and he falls down on his knees. That was something he truly hadn't expected to hear. "Why would I do that? Why can't I remember it? What is this _nonsense_?" he almost shouts, clenching his fists. He leans his head forward, his long bangs falling to cover his face, and right now the silver-haired man feels thankful for that. He feels like he wants to hide.

"Well, it's kind of a long story", Zack grimaces, "but I'll tell you all."

Sephiroth nods. He has a feeling he won't like what he's about to hear but he knows that for some reason, it is important that he listens. Still on his knees, he lifts his head to look Zack in the eyes.

"Tell me. Tell me everything. What has happened to me?"

---

Time doesn't always flow naturally in Lifestream. It may take an eternity, or just a flashing moment for things to happen there. Zack's story takes a while to tell, as he tries to find the gentlest way to tell the man of the pains and horrors of the past years. The dark-haired SOLDIER can see he has rustled the ex-General enough to make him drop his arrogance for a while, and he hopes fervently the man won't adopt it again before he is done talking to him. He is worried that Sephiroth might snap again when he hears about Jenova and why he went insane in the first place, but it is better to present the facts to him here than risk him finding out on his own again. The previous time didn't go that well, after all.

"I did all that?" Sephiroth whispers in disbelief as Zack fills him in on everything that happened, in Nibelheim, everything since Nibelheim, all the way to the incident with the three clones and Jenova the previous summer.

"Jenova did it, not you", Zack reassures, a hint of sadness in his voice. It pains him to see his former General and friend in a state like this. "She made you think she was your true mother, she controlled you, used you… I think some part of you was conscious but it only surfaced when you got close to Spike."

"Spike… Cloud? I remember Cloud." Sudden burst of memories sends the silver haired man reeling. Images of Cloud, memories of Cloud, feelings of Cloud bombard his mind. He remembers the slender young blonde, the gravity defying spikes of his hair, the impossibly blue eyes he has. How the young man had been so wary around him, and how his eyes had shone when he'd looked at Sephiroth. He sees Cloud training, Cloud getting teased by Zack, Cloud smiling… He remembers what it is like to touch Cloud, and he remembers how it feels to kiss Cloud. Yet another barrier holding back his memories breaks, this time they're more personal, more private.

"Cloud… I remember Cloud crying. That's the last thing I remember", Sephiroth says as he fights to regain his composure. Had Cloud been crying because of something he had done? Zack just shrugs his shoulders in his usual nonchalant manner.

"Spike cried, yes. He still does, but you know how emotional the kid can be when the mood hits him. Of course he's not really a kid any longer", Zack grins. The silver-haired man realizes that Cloud must have grown up by now, Zack has told him how many years have passed in the world… Last time the blonde had been 16, old enough but still so young.

"Is he all right? I didn't hurt him, did I? I can't have killed him, right?" Sephiroth asks, twinge of desperation and guilt in his voice. He feels everything but arrogant, Zack's meaning finally hitting its target.

"He is alive, though you ruffled him a bit last summer", the dark-haired SOLDIER says. Sephiroth frowns. Zack has told him what happened, of course, but he can't say that he remembers.

"Don't worry, Seph. It was Jenova, using your shell again", Zack's tries to achieve calming effect with his words. "Guess there was a little bit of you there too because she didn't finish Cloud off, just smacked him around a bit. But Spike really couldn't take more of it, not anymore. It has been too hard on him. And I'm glad he doesn't have to, now that Jenova is gone. Once more would have killed him, if not his body then his spirit."

Sephiroth presses his fingers to his temples. He has a hard time accepting all the things that have been done in his name and appearance. He was the hero, the legendary General. He was supposed to be the protector. And then he had tried to destroy the Planet, consumed by some sort of madness. He would never even have dreamed of doing such things. He had hurt Cloud. His Cloud… The silver-haired man feels his stomach clench as the thought enters his mind.

"Cloud must hate me for all the pain I've caused him…" he whispers almost inaudibly.

"Spike doesn't always show his feelings, but he doesn't hate you", he hears Zack say as the man crouches down next to the former General. "He knows it was Jenova all the time. And he is, after all, the reason we're having this little get-together."

Sephiroth stares blankly at Zack, not quite comprehending what the dark-haired man is saying.

"You know what day it is today, Seph?" Zack asks abruptly.

"No, something important happening today?" the ex-General frowns at the sudden change of subject.

"It's Yule", Zack laughs, as a twig of mistletoe suddenly materializes between his fingers. "And Spike only wants one thing for present. You want to be a part of that?"

_Ah, so this is all about Cloud…_ The silver-haired man realizes the full extent of how much he misses the diminutive blonde. Cloud has meant more to him than he would ever dare to admit to anyone, ever since that Yule when Zack played the mistletoe prank. He still isn't sure why Zack is telling him all this, why he is here, but for the first time in his life, the silver-haired man decides to just go with the flow.

"So what say you, Seph? Want to make Spike happy?" Zack asks, interrupting Sephiroth's train of thought. He smiles secretively as he twirls the mistletoe between his fingers, and winks. Sephiroth glances up to Zack. He has caused the blonde so much pain against his own will. What could he possibly do to help make the man happy?

"What can I do, Zack? What will make him happy? Is he even the same person anymore after all these years and all that has happened?" the former General asks, gazing down to the swirls of the Lifestream.

"Spike is always Spike. And you can help him just by being yourself", Zack grins that impossibly wide grin of his, a tell tale sign he is up to no good, as he taps his nose secretively. "Wait here a moment. I'll go see if they are ready", he says as he dissolves from sight.

Sephiroth scrambles up from his knees on to his feet and spins around looking for a trace of the dark haired SOLDIER. All he can see is the flowing green of the Lifestream.

"Wait here… As if I have anywhere else to go to…" he snorts.

Suddenly, he hears a rumble, and feels as if he's washed up with a giant wave, unable to fight against it. Everything around him flickers first green and then abruptly goes black.

---

There's a sudden burst of blinding light and the world is restored. He feels a soft touch of a hand retreat from his forehead and he is soaked, his lungs are burning as he coughs up water, fighting for more air. The silver-haired man shivers, and although the air is rather warm here, there's a tinge of frost lingering in it. He feels that someone is trying to dry him with a blanket, and unexpectedly strong arms cradle him. A familiar scent permeates the air around him, it is slightly different than what he remembers but he would still know that scent anywhere. He feels something soft and warm press against his lips and he opens his eyes. World is still a blur but he'd know that blue anywhere.

_Cloud…_

Cloud looks almost the same as he did in his last real memory of him. He has aged a bit, not much… Zack has filled him in on what Hojo had done to both of them, but he didn't expect to see so little change on the blonde. Cloud looks harder and stronger, and the silver-haired man looks for the youth that he remembers. Then he sees the tears running down the blonde man's face, the expression in his eyes, and there he sees his Cloud, the Cloud he remembers.

"Cloud..." his voice is weak, barely a whisper, and his throat is sore from coughing up the water. "Zack came to see me... and told me you wanted to be happy... Why are you crying, Cloud?" he tries to lift his hand but he feels so tired, the familiar traces of Mako poisoning announcing their presence. _Makes sense, it wasn't just an injection, he'd nearly drowned in the Lifestream itself…_

Cloud looks down at him, tears streaming down his face. But there's no sorrow or hatred in those shimmering blue eyes, only joy and love. He feels Cloud hug him closer, pull him into an even tighter embrace, burying his face into his still wet matted hair, gently kissing his brow as if he's afraid to break him. "I thought I'd never see you again", the blonde murmurs. "I've missed you so much, I don't ever want to lose you again. I love you, Seph."

He hears Zack's voice in the distance, and another voice, a woman's voice he thinks he should recognize. He feels Cloud cradling him, and tries to open his eyes, but the sudden exhaustion of Mako poisoning has taken him over. He isn't sure how he ended up here, but Cloud is happy and that is all that matters right now. The silver-haired man now fully understands Zack's words about second chances and not blowing them. He can worry about other things later. He leans his body closer against Cloud's and lets himself drift to sleep, just for a while…

**Author's notes:**

1. All together: AWWWWW! Sorry, I think me and fluff are an all too sugary combination. Have a salt cracker.

2. Yikes. I think my Sephiroth turned into an uke. Oh well, makes for an interesting lemon if I ever decide to take this story that far. Well, AC kinda made them interchangeable so I guess it's all good in the end, I don't really have a decided preference on this pairing anyway.

3. Where as some of you think that Sephi is quite the bastard and all of that, I think of him as quite an honourable man who has the ability to care for others, if he wants to. And my Sephi will damn well take good care of Cloud, because otherwise I'd give him a good kick on that muscular, well formed… ass… Ahem…

4. I don't know how this turned out the way it did. It just sorta… manifested on the paper. Automatic writing, that sorta shitz… So if Sephi is totally ooc, bite me, and write a better one. I thought Zack was hard to control but Sephi just totally turned out like this on his own accord. I did nothing! NOTHING!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Cid is at his limit. He hasn't cursed all evening, Tifa has no tea left in the house and he desperately needs a cup. He is even feeling like trying out Reno's punch when his cell phone rings. Thankful for the distraction, he takes the call.

"Who is it?" the pilot bites back a string of swear words that reflexively try to attach to the end of each sentence.

"It's Vincent. Cid, this is going to sound weird, but I need you to come meet me at the Sierra, and I need you to do it without telling anyone why. Make an excuse", Vincent's voice is calm like usual but Cid has an eerie feeling something isn't all right. Vincent rarely pulls any weird shit, the pilot frowns.

"What the h…eck are you going on about, Valentine?" the older blonde almost bites his tongue. Damn kids, damn Tifa for asking him to watch his language.

"Just do it, it is important. Make an excuse, something wrong with the Sierra, anything. Come to meet me there as soon as possible", Vincent hangs up without further explanation. Cid stares at his cell phone for a while, then pockets it and sighs. At least there will be some tea on the Sierra. The pilot thinks for a moment, before he sets off to tell Tifa that there is a technical problem on the airship and he has to go check it. He waves at Reeve, who has come to the party in person to everyone's surprise. They will all be too busy milling around him to miss him for a while.

---

This night is definitely turning into one of the most interesting and bizarre experiences in Vincent's life, and he has witnessed some really bizarre things over the years. The ex-Turk has gone to meet Cid on the airship alone to pave the way for Cloud and the present he has received from the Planet. The red-cloaked man isn't sure what word he should use of the former General. The really hard part is breaking the news to the blonde pilot.

Cid is already on the bridge of the airship when Vincent steps in. He is cradling a cup of steaming hot tea, smoking furiously, and muttering profanities under his breath as if to try and catch up with his quota after holding his tongue for most of the evening.

"Valentine, what the fuck is going on?" the pilot yells at the red-cloaked man. "Why all this damn secrecy?"

Vincent glances at the fuming man. "You better drink your tea before I tell you."

Cid narrows his eyes but takes a swig from his teacup, launching into another string of curses as he burns his tongue. Vincent sighs under his breath as he leans on the railing next to the pilot. Maybe this isn't such a good idea, but Cid is trustworthy and a good friend under his harsh façade.

"It's about Cloud", the ex-Turk starts, once Cid has emptied his teacup. "He has a… visitor, someone from his past", Vincent frowns as he tries to find the words.

"The kid gotten himself into some trouble?" Cid raises his eyebrow. "Don't tell me he's got an old girlfriend stashed somewhere?"

"Well, definitely not a girlfriend", Vincent bites his lip. The pilot's face creases into a frown and then the understanding hits him.

"Are you trying to tell me that Cloud swings _that_ way?" Cid asks patting his pockets for a new pack of cigarettes.

"Apparently", Vincent replies stoically. "He says the Planet returned the man to him."

Cid sighs. As unexpected this news was, it really was none of his business. "So you dragged me here just to tell me that the kid is gay?" Vincent winces at the words.

"No. I dragged you here because he needs help and some place for him and the other man to stay at least overnight", the ex-Turk is glad the pilot hasn't exploded so far, though the real bomb is still around the corner.

"Yeah, sure, whatever, as long as they behave", Cid gestures. "My home is your home, or whatever they say in Mideel." Cid pauses for a while. "You said someone from Cloud's past. Anyone I know?" the pilot asks, he isn't unknown to gossiping.

"Glad you asked…" Vincent drops his bomb.

---

Cid splutters an exquisite selection of swear words, while chain smoking half a pack of cigarettes, then tries fervently to cough out a lung, before he finally calms down. He uses some new curse words too, the ex-Turk notices during the outburst, lifting his eyebrow. Probably ones saved specifically for occasions like this. Vincent is always amazed at how graphic the pilot can be in his anger.

"So, you serious about this, Valentine?" Cid asks the red-cloaked man. Deep down he is hoping the world would soon restore itself to normality and not this weirdness Vincent is talking about.

"Do I look like I'm joking?" Vincent replies, his face totally blank.

"No, but then again, you never do", the pilot mutters under his breath, taking a new cigarette. _I'll be damned… Wouldn't have guessed that in a million years._

After the initial shock the pilot behaves quite matter of factly. Cid was a ShinRa employee for a long time, and he had even met Sephiroth once or twice before the younger man had been promoted to General. There had of course been a lot of rumours about the silver-haired man already in the old ShinRa days. But the man he had met years ago had not been rotten, instead in his mind a decent enough lad with way too much responsibility on his young shoulders.

If both the kid and Vincent say he is all right, it is good enough for him. Besides, he has seen weirder shit happen, so the dead coming back to life is barely making the top ten. Though dead ShinRa Generals coming back to life is a matter for itself…

---

The pilot waits for Cloud by the entrance hatch of the Sierra. He knows the kid is on his way, Vincent had phoned him that it was okay to come. He still can't help looking startled when the younger blonde steps aboard the Sierra carrying the silver-haired ex-General as if the man weighs nothing. Even if Sephiroth still is psycho, he is clearly in no state of posing a threat to anyone. Somehow, it doesn't feel any less weird when you actually _see_ the man.

Cloud looks into Cid's eyes defiantly, as if challenging the pilot to say something, to lash out, get any grudges out of the way immediately. Thankfully, the older man is smarter than that. He ignores the provocation, and instead points the younger blonde toward the direction of the cabins, nodding at him with what he hopes is a reassuring smile.

"Pick whichever you think is best… They're all unoccupied at the moment", he says, gesturing down the hallway. The pilot sees Cloud's defiance crackle and the man smiles back at him, confident that he understands at least on some level.

To be truthful, Cid has no fucking idea what in the blazes of Ifrit is going on, but he is hoping Cloud or someone to enlighten him, the sooner the better. He also has a terrible craving for another cup of tea.

---

Choosing one of the bigger cabins, Cloud pushes the door open, carefully manoeuvring inside with his precious burden. Cid has certainly put attention to detail when decorating the Sierra, or maybe he has let Shera do it for him. The beds are wider and softer than on the old Highwind, not the usual ShinRa military issue stuff. The cabin of his choice has two beds, a table and a couple of chairs, and a nightstand.

The blonde ex-SOLDIER places the silver-haired man gently on one of the beds, and unwraps the blankets covering him before he pulls the thick and warm covers over the man so he doesn't get chilled. The blonde knows it might take days for the older man to sleep away his Mako poisoning. There is a feverish sheen to the man's skin, but luckily his brow isn't too hot, just slightly warmer to the touch than it usually would be.

Sephiroth looks exactly like Cloud remembers. Exactly like that morning in Nibelheim before the fateful journey to the reactor in the mountains, the last time he saw the true him, the person he has loved through all these years. There's an aura of peace around the silver-haired man now, something Cloud has never before sensed, but in a way that makes sense to him. Jenova is gone now, there is no one to whisper lies in the man's mind, nothing to drive him over the edge of madness.

Cloud caresses the sleeping man's cheek. He has everything he has ever wanted now. The blonde knows there is nothing he can do for his love right now, except to stay with him in case he wakes up, and make sure he stays warm and comfortable. Well, actually there is one thing he could do… Cloud smiles as he remembers one of his favourite evening rituals from years ago. He grabs a few extra pillows from the other bed and arranges them around the sleeping man's head. He removes his boots before climbing on the bed next to the man and picks up a hairbrush and a comb from Cid's well stocked nightstand. Still smiling gently he starts to untangle the man's matted hair. Zack was right, Sephiroth was always so meticulous about his hair, and it had been so long time since he'd been able to do this for him…

He is almost painstakingly careful not to pull too hard as he gently works through the tangled silver. He wishes he could wash the older man's hair, but that has to wait… Tangles give in to his fingers, as he runs his hand through the strands, then he brushes them until they shine like silk in the dim light of the cabin. Cloud is almost humming to himself, hoping the other man would be awake to enjoy the moment too.

He is halfway through his task when there's a knock on the door. "Come in", the blonde says, lifting his gaze from the tangles in the silvery hair as Vincent opens the door and steps in, closing it behind him again. The red-cloaked man is carrying a tray of food which he places on the table.

There is an unmistakable hint of amusement in those red eyes as Vincent takes in the scene of Cloud, the hairbrush and the mass of hair, neatly arranged on the pillows. The blonde feels his face blush.

"I brought you some food, there's enough for Sephiroth too if he wakes up", the ex-Turk says, nodding to the blonde man. "Cid and I, we have to go back to the party or the others will get suspicious. I presume you'll want to stay with him?"

Cloud nods, his face still blushed, his hand frozen in movement, hairbrush still touching a tuft of hair.

"Don't let me detain you", Vincent is trying hard not to smile. "We'll find a way to prepare the others for the news. But it'll probably have to wait until tomorrow. They will be too drunk to rationalize tonight if they have been drinking Reno's punch."

The thought of Reno and the punch strikes amusement in the blonde man, but his expression is also filled with thankfulness for Vincent's understanding. Without another word, the former Turk slips out of the cabin, letting Cloud return to his task of combing the tangles out of his lover's hair.

Vincent stands in the hallway for a moment, calling up the scene he had just witnessed and chuckles under his breath. Cloud had looked so happy and at the same time, like a kid with his hand caught in a cookie jar. Shaking his head, the red-cloaked man heads to meet Cid.

---

Back at 7th Heaven, Tifa is going out of her mind for worrying. First Cloud had left without a word, then Vincent too had disappeared. And then Cid had made an obvious excuse about some problem with the Sierra. Reeve's arrival had distracted her for a while, but the brunette fighter is by no means stupid, and she smells trouble. She winces as she hears Reno launch into another one of his stories, she is quite certain they're in no way appropriate for the young ears of the kids, but the red-head is unstoppable once he gets into full swing. For a while she even contemplated kicking Reno out of her bar, but it is Yule after all. And the poor man probably doesn't have any other place to go to since he isn't with his family on such an evening.

Tifa spins around as she hears the door open and sees the red-cloaked former Turk and the foul-mouthed pilot step in. Quickly she darts to meet them, in the hopes that they might have news of Cloud.

"Guys, where have you been? Have you seen Cloud?" she blurts hurriedly. Cid seems a little uneasy but Vincent's calm cannot be broken by conventional means.

"Cloud is all right. He met an… old friend, who needed help, so he decided to stay with them", Vincent ventures, as diplomatically and neutrally as he possibly can. He knows the temperamentical brunette will be the toughest nut to crack when Cloud is ready to break the news to his friends. But now is not the time, not here, and most definitely not right now.

"Don't worry about the kid, he's doing fine", Cid manages a smile he hopes looks reassuring.

"Okay…" Tifa is frowning, she isn't sure what to think of this. She had expected to toast the old year away and welcome the new together with Cloud.

"Cloud will tell you himself once he returns", Vincent assures her, grimacing inwardly. _Sorry Cloud, no way to make this easier for you_…

Commotion from the other end of the room catches their attention. Somehow, time has flown by and it's almost midnight. Yuffie is climbing on the table, her moogle hat drooping to the side, as she pulls Reno up with her.

"Okay guys, it's toast time!" she chimes, poking Reno's ribs for more punch.

"Come on, lets go toast with the others", Cid suggests.

"New year… Time to start with a clean slate", Vincent muses. Tifa can't help to think that there's a dual meaning to the man's words.

"Okay, let's go", she resigns with a smile. _I don't know what could be more important than celebrating with your friends, Cloud, but I hope it's something that makes you happy_.

They join the others, Yuffie's bickering about no more punch for her sounding above the cheers.

---

The darkest night of the year winds on, the midwinter holiday waving goodbye to the old year, and welcoming in the new. In Tifa's 7th Heaven, old friends raise a toast to each other and the years to come.

Nearby, aboard the airship, the world's happiest man is in a heaven of his own, spending his night combing the hair of an angel, before he too drifts into sleep cradling the love he once lost but found again in his arms.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

**Author's notes:**

1. It says in the warnings it's fluffy. God it's so fluffy! Eee

2. I told you, Cid has to behave. Well I gave him a few bad words. That's all he'll get from me for now.

3. Cloud combing Sephiroth's hair tru luv. I love that image.

4. See note for part 1 concerning Yule.

5. Kirsty! Thanks for the feedback, it made me rewrite a big part of this chapter!


End file.
